Jimmy Savile Row: Sir Jimmy’s Tips On Girls And Suits
SIR Jimmy Savile OBE, as he must be known, appears in a string vest, Stoke Mandeville bring-and-buy sale shell suit and hair like spun toffee.
Sir Jimmy appears in the Daily Sport, sandwiched between news of a teacher caught having sex with a teenager and the question “WHO’LL BE FIRST TO LAY LEON?”, an insight into the glamour model betting syndicate’s sweep on Celebrity X Factor winner Leon Jackson.
Readers may hope Sir Jimmy’s presence marks the beginning of the paper’s new “Dear Jimmy…” feature, in which the fixer of dreams will be invited to fix it for readers to reach the top shelf at the newsagents and meet a real life woman, perhaps over the internet or at a car boot sale.
And Jimmy does have a tip. Recently he was mugged for his round glasses. “I haven’t been jumped on by a girl for 50 years!” says Sir Jimmy. “It was wonderful. I don’t know what she looks like, but I sure know what she feels like.”
One imagines, gibbering Jimmy’s inner eyes envisages a young Margaret Drabble in a hood. Or a young Bonnie Langford dressed in a shell suit. Other than being called Sir Jimmy, Sir Jimmy’s other theme is to wear his aforesaid shell suit at all times.
Odd indeed that the man who shares his surname with Savile Row, the London thoroughfare famous for its gentleman’s outfitters, should deliver: “It’s tracksuits all the time. When I get tired, or I’m in Scotland and it’s freezing cold, its off with the shoes, straight into bed with the tracksuit, and then, in the morning, it’s shoes on, and you’re already dressed.”
Daily Sport readers nod, make notes and look forward to more top tips on how to make it with the girls…
Posted: 17th, December 2007 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids Comments (4) | TrackBack | Permalink
