The Women In Simon Cowell’s Threesome Revealed: Sex And Super-Injunctions
SIMON Cowell wants us know that he once had sex with two woman in one bed. It’s front-page news on the Sun, via which we learn:
COWELL: MY THREE-IN-BED SECRET – Night with pair of beauties was ‘cool’
The word “cool” manages to age Cowell and give us a hint at how long ago the event occurred. Moreover, this sex-sational revelation manages to remove from the front pages news that the star of Cowell’s latest ITV pap-fest Red Or Black beats up women.
It is, indeed, odd that a man who is rumoured to have shagged 2000 women has not been the subject of a single shag ‘n’ tell in the tabloids. Who needs super-injunctions? Not Simon Cowell. It is thus left to the top shagger to tell us about his fairytale life:
SIMON Cowell yesterday sensationally confessed to having a three-in-a-bed session with two mystery beauties.
The women who shagged the telly supremo worth a mint are a mystery? For how long can they remain so? Surely they will make themselves known?
As if to prove the point of Cowell’s threesome, The Sun illustrates it with a photo of the entertainer holding two fingers aloft. It looks like a Churchillian ‘V’ for Victory. But Anorak thinks we’re being invited to sniff the digits by way of evidence of Cowell’s sexual doings.
The X Factor chief, 51, revealed in his raunchiest-ever interview how he found himself alone with the two gorgeous girls. He said of the encounter, which he confessed happened “years ago”: “I was just with these two girls and we ended up in bed. It was cool — I liked it.”
No shit, Simon. Shagging two women at once is not as bad as it’s cracked up to be. Men of the world, hear Simon’s words and heed his message. Do not be afeared. Tell the women that you will have a threesome. It will be okay.
Cowell also admitted sharing a blind date with Charlie Sheen’s ex Denise Richards, 40, when she was eight months pregnant — and said he romped with other celebs, who he would not name.
He tells us he romped with celebs but will not tell us their names? Oh, come on, Si, you big tease. Maybe one of the women can step forward?
And asked whether he is still engaged to make-up artist Mezhgan Hussainy, 37, he replied: “I’m not sure.”
Can we ask her?
Pressed on the remark during a US radio interview, he added: “It’s something I would need to say to you off the radio. I do get embarrassed talking about these things publicly.”
Says Simon Cowell on the radio with a man whose idea of entertainment is to get porn stags to shag a fake penis on a demented bucking bronco.
Cowell can’t tell you who he did shag but he can tell who he did not shag:
Asked if he had enjoyed showbiz conquests, Cowell said: “I have. I can’t tell you who.” Then, getting the mum of three’s name wrong, he added: “I did have a bizarre blind date with Denise Lewis, Charlie Sheen’s ex.” After he was corrected on her name, he added: “She’s cute. We met in a hotel and she turned up eight months pregnant with a dog in her handbag. She’s a bit of a whacko — but I like that.”
Ladies, come on. Do tell on Simon Cowell and his sexploits. He’s opened the door for you step through. Now, where are you? Where?
Posted: 8th, September 2011 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (3) | TrackBack | Permalink
