Mange Tout, Kate?

‘ALL ‘Porchugenees’ speakers beware – Jade is interested in your language and plans to murder it at her considerable leisure.

Pork scratch and sniff

Over the past few weeks, Jade has come to resemble some Del Boy/Hilda Ogden hybrid. ‘Mange tout, mange tout,’ says Del Girl. ‘Look at my lovely muriel,’ says the linguist who sounds like her tongue has been placed in the immortal Ogden rollers.

Alex is still her main source of information, her window on plant earth. This is dangerous, and although Alex is well travelled, and has a German mother, he is still not the last word on international relations.

The last word is usually Jade’s. And when Kate and Jonny began to take the rise out of her, comparing the erstwhile Jade to EastEnders Pat Butcher, the south London terrier chimed in. She told them to stop repeating themselves.

So Kate moved on, wondering if the crowd outside on eviction night would throw pork scratchings at Jade. ‘Repeat! Repeat! Repeat!’ screamed Jade, repetitively.

So Kate tried again. She conjured up an image of Jade lunching like a seal to catch the flying porky bites in her chops.

But Kate and the rest can only wonder what will happen come E Day, when it will be time to say goodbye..

Or bonjour, as Jade might put it.

‘

Posted: 23rd, July 2002 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink