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Knickers!

by | 6th, September 2002

‘RICHARD, being a financial advisor, always has plenty of money-making ideas up his sleeve. From stealing money off corpses to bludgeoning ex-wives over the head, he’s now moved on to stealing his own car. With creditors snapping at his heels, he came up with the bright idea of selling his car and then telling everyone it had been stolen. At this rate, by Christmas he’ll be selling baby Bethany on the Internet to the Kilshaws.

There are also cash flow problems over at the factory. Mike agreed to supply a large order of Gareth Gates Pants for Dev’s cousin and promised the girls big bonuses if they finished on time. Unfortunately for them, it turns out that Dev’s cousin is about as reliable as the stitching on an Underworld gusset and his cheque bounced. He’s clearly a brave man though: having a fuming Mike Baldwin chasing after you is one thing (he’d only be able to punch up to your knees anyway) but having twenty rabid factory girls is another.

And to make matters worse for poor Mike, it looks Karen McDonald will be asking him for her old job back. Karen’s job in a designer furniture store (think Ikea pine covered in leopard skin off-cuts from Underworld) didn’t last very long. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t hide the fact that she thought Starke was the TV partner of Hutch.

Things are looking up on the job front for Sally though. Somehow she’s managed to convince Peter to take her on at the bookies. With Aunt Sally behind the counter, his profits are going to take a nosedive. It won’t be long before she’s lecturing punters on how they should be spending their money on fish fingers for their kids and not on the 12-1 long shot at Ripon.

Ashley has come clean that is was him who defaced the plaque outside their house, changing it from ‘Balmoral’ to ‘Immoral’. I find it hard to believe; Ashley wouldn’t know how to spell ‘Immoral’.

Vera, though, is still persisting on calling her stoneclad shack ‘The Rectory’ and has even gone as far as getting Kirk to print up calling card announcing the fact. ”Who’s Jock Duckwort?” asked Betty when Vera proudly handed her a card. Vera hasn’t paid much attention to Jack in the 30-odd years they’ve been married, so I doubt she’s going to start worrying about a little thing like his name now.



Posted: 6th, September 2002 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink