Not So Slim Pickings

‘PRAGUE is currently at the mercy of the so-called Obese Family, a ruthless gang of pickpockets.

”It’s a military operation,” said Bruce Jefferson, ”and if The Obese Family chose you, there is nothing you can do about it. They’re so fast, the victim can’t even see what’s going on, so he has no chance.”

The gang operate on trams, and their method is simple but unusual, as another witness explains: ”First, an innocent-looking pregnant woman gets into the tram and demands a tourist’s seat, and when he stands up, five hugely obese men quickly move in and surround him with their stomachs.

”Within seconds, the gang is rifling his pockets, and his valuables are dumped into a carrier bag, which is handed to a slimmer youth. He flees from the tram, often screaming ‘The Obese Family has struck again’ in Czech, while the tourist is detained by a wall of blubber until the next stop.

”The five fat men are usually so noisy that the tourist usually doesn’t even realise what’s going on until it’s too late. He just thinks that the tram is particularly crowded. And when The Obese Family are on board, it is.” ‘

Posted: 12th, September 2002 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink