Rambling On

‘THEY came in their thousands. Whether by train, cow or combine harvester, 407,791 protestors from the countryside descended on London yesterday to complain about their lot.

”When we grow up, we want to be ripped apart by hounds”

It’s a definite number, isn’t it – and the Telegraph has done well to be so precise.

Like a farmer counting his sheep as they jump over the fence, through the ring of fire and then into the pit, the paper chews its pen and watches the masses walk through the capital on their way to Parliament Square.

And what a motley crew they were! There was Elle McPherson, saying ”no more” to something or other on her way to the just-outside-the-seat-of-power, a stone’s throw from the shops.

And that’s Vinnie Jones, giving it to the city slickers with both barrels as he autographs a ”Save Our Countryside” placard.

And the paper also spots Edward Fox and television chef Clarissa Dickson-Wright in her trademark woman-in-sensible-shoes garb.

As the Telegraph gawps, spotting such and such, Mr Gaskell, a van driver no less, taps the paper’s man on the scene on the shoulder and says: ”There are no toffs in our hunt.”

But there are ferrets on your walk, and the Guardian spots one perched on his owner’s shoulder.

The little fella’s even got badge on. ”March for LIBERTY & LIVLIHOOD,” it says, which gives the Guardian’s right-on thinkers something furry to look at over their morning mueseli, and rabbits something to read before their throats are ripped out.

But there is a picture missing, and we can only lament the lack of foresight by the Times’ snapper.

In among the big names, and even bigger double-barrel names, was John McCririck, the Channel 4 racing pundit and resident of the country idyll of Primrose Hill, Camdenshire, walking around with a dead fox on his head.

Which is another example of a second-rate celebrity jumping on a passing haywain.

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Posted: 23rd, September 2002 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink