A Dog’s Life

‘JON is a twin. Justine is also a twin. We are under the sign of Gemini. Can the fact that Jon and Justine are up for eviction be linked to the planets?

”And if I squeeze with a pressure equivalent to 2.3 Newtons…”

Perhaps yes. Perhaps no. Jon does have a hairy back – something not seen on TV since World of Sport and Dickie Davies took us wrestling.

And Justine is too fat to win. There are, of course, many cameras in the house and since we know that each camera puts on 10lbs in weight, it might be just plain unlucky that they are all pointing at Justine all the time.

So who will go and who will stay? The smart money says that Jon will remain in the house for far longer than his entertainment credentials merit.

Jon is a loser, a dog among underdogs, and that gives him a chance with the great British public. ”I’m sorry everybody,” said Jon apologetically. ”I’m sorry I’m really shit at this.”

Ah, poor Jon, he’s just an everyday loser – whereas, as we know, the rest of the gang are special cases.

‘

Posted: 4th, June 2003 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink