Auf Wiedersehen

”’IS this Lie-cester Square?” ”Where The Mousetrap?” ”Ya, Jan, zat plistic bobby’s helmit is really cool. I mist ‘ave one?”

”And how many palaces does the Royal Lego set come with?”

It’s the kind of language that hasn’t been heard in this country since Britain became as popular a tourist destination as a cold Sunday in Kabul.

So yesterday the same people who dream up National Sausage Week and National Walking Backwards Minute asked us to celebrate the inaugural National Tourism Day.

And that meant the Royal Family – ”one of Britain’s premier tourist attractions” (Independent) – were pressed into action.

What a fun day out was had by one and all. Mater and pater Windsor went to Legoland in, er, Windsor and looked at Lego models of things like Buckingham Palace, Windsor Castle and life-sized Lego bust of their own heads.

The Telegraph looks on as the Legoland staff try to present Philip, who was 82 years old yesterday, with a ”Happy Birthday” badge.

The offer was waved away by a flunky, but the crowd could not be deterred from singing Happy Birthday as the couple boarded the ”kiddies’ train”.

Meanwhile, the Independent spots the Duke of York in the Drunken Duck Pub in the Lake District; the Princess Royal at the Royal Navy Submarine Museum, Hampshire; and Prince Charles pulling on a kilt and sampling Scotch malt in Edinburgh.

By now, you’re wondering like the rest of us what happened to the Wessexes. The Telegraph spots Sophie at Pennywell Farm, Devon, chatting to lambs.

But where is Eddie? Oh, the Independent’s caught sight of him taking in the delights of a caravan park in Brynich, Wales, and then disappearing down a hole at the National Caves Show at Brecon.

It’s just great to see them Royals doing their bit. And if their German and Greek kin can take a feather from their caps, the British tourist industry might yet be saved.

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Posted: 11th, June 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink