Fallen Angels

‘DEMI Moore has had so many lifts and tucks that even her clothes are confused.

With her face and shoulders done, Demi’s skin iron horribly ran out of steam

Last night she turned up to a premiere of Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle with a dress which, the Mail says, ”was cut so low it was almost a skirt”.

”Several inches of lacy bra were on show,” the paper says disapprovingly (below a picture of the several inches of lacy bra in question).

The reason for the mix-up is quite simple – the dress in question was clearly designed for Demi’s old body, the one with the breasts that used to swing around her waist.

But these days Demi’s body laughs in the face of gravity, her skin stretched tighter than a snare drum.

”For 40-year-old Miss Moore,” the Mail says, ”the event was clearly a chance to show off the £250,000 of cosmetic surgery she is said to have undergone since splitting from husband Bruce Willis in 1998.”

For Cameron Diaz and Drew Barrymore, it was a chance to get drunk.

The paper shows the two walking to the pre-show party in New York’s Trump Plaza carrying what it describes as a near-empty bottle of champagne.

”That was a direct flouting of New York laws, which ban drinking in the street and say that all bottles must be concealed in brown paper bags,” it says.

And an unnamed – and almost certainly imaginary – onlooker is up in arms.

”They were clearly drunk and not that steady on their feet, although they looked like they were having a good time,” he or she tells the paper.

”They have got a lot of young fans – Cameron especially is popular after lending her voice to Princess Fiona in Shrek – and it definitely doesn’t set a good example to them.”

Indeed, not. Now they will all be wanting to get pissed on vintage champagne rather than their normal concoction of Bacardi Breezer and Red Bull.

‘

Posted: 27th, June 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink