A Call To Arms

‘WOULD you inject car paint into your skin? It’s a difficult question, isn’t it?

‘And I want my Mondeo done in the same colour…’

If the alternative was listening to Tony Blair address the US Congress, then most people would probably answer ‘Yes’ (or, in the case of Gordon Brown, ‘Yes, please!’)

But if you were about to get tattooed, you might think twice.

Yet the Guardian reports that, according to the European Commission, car paint is used by many tattooists and standards of hygiene are generally low in the body art business.

The solution is clear. In future, hairnets must be worn, fingernails kept short and clean, hands washed regularly, and cigarette ash kept well away from broken skin.

Needles must conform to EC standards, and tattoos of bananas must not be no shorter than 12.5 centimetres and curve by no more than 10 degrees.

Now here’s another question. Are you going to let a bunch of bureaucratic busybodies tell you what you can and can’t stick in your arm?

Of course you’re not. Down the paint shop, now, and any Union Jack smaller than your forearm will be treated as an act of treason.

We’ll show those Brussels bastards if it kills us.

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Posted: 18th, July 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink