Real Love

‘DAVID Beckham hasn’t even got to Spain but he’s apparently homesick already, telling the papers that he misses his family, pie, mash and jellied eels – but not necessarily in that order.

”Nice hair-do. Shame about the wife”

Real’s new No.23 is currently on the final leg of the club’s Far East tour in Hong Kong, where the Sun helps to ease his pain by tracking down a pie and mash shop and delivering a meal to his hotel room.

But Becks is promised an even warmer welcome when his plane finally touches down in Madrid, with Basque separatist group ETA training their telescopic sights on the pony-tailed superstar.

A source close to the group tells the Express: ”Real Madrid stand for everything we oppose. ETA members can see the fuss and publicity this tour is making.

”It makes Beckham a very attractive target.”

They are not alone in finding Beckham attractive – the England skipper recently came second in a poll to find the world’s sexiest man.

The winner was Justin Timberlake, although the source does not divulge what ETA’s feelings are about him.

However, Beckham can console himself that ETA are not the only terrorist group that wants to kill him.

The Sun has a list of 13 Islamic groups who are intent on murdering innocent Westerners, several of whom are said to quite fancy Beckham as well.

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Posted: 7th, August 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink