A Rash Act

‘SINCE a lance is a weapon most often used to prick an unsightly boil we note that someone of that name has just married Ulrika Jonsson.

Isn’t it great when two people really deserve each other

The Sun spots ”grinning” Lance Gerrard-Wright the morning after his wedding to the Swedish TV weather girl emeritus.

We are even invited to zoom in on Lance’s neck on which sits a large red marks. The Star has a similar shot and asks us to believe that it could be a love bite.

It could also be a rash. And if Lance has been reading the news over the last few weeks he should a) be thankful that it’s only on his neck and b) get it seen to immediately.

But rather than keeping a safe distance, the Mirror rubs up close and shares a few words with the couple on their wedding day.

Talking of the post-wedding reception, Lance conjures an image to bring a smile to all our faces. ”Our first dance was to I Had The Time Of My Life from Dirty Dancing,” he confides. ”We even performed out own special routine which we had practised once or twice.”

Looking beyond the live floorshow, Lance tells how he then picked up a handy guitar and serenaded Ulrika with Paul Weller’s You Do Something To Me. Perhaps something she learnt from her time with John Leslie.

And since the wedding day coincided with her birthday, her 36th birthday, Lance also delivered a prepared encore, singing a version of Haircut 100’s Fantastic Day with new lyrics specially written for Ulrika.

That’s a song which in its original classic form contains the line ”Well I can find a funny feeling”. As we say, Lance, get it checked out, mate…

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Posted: 18th, August 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink