You’ve Been Juiced

‘IT turns out that there is something more frightening than having to sit through a whole Madonna film – appearing on America’s newest reality TV show.

‘You’ve been juiced!’

The idea (and bear in mind that the dateline on this edition of the National Enquirer is not April 1) is for a show in which OJ Simpson surprises celebrities in the manner of Ashton Kutcher in Punk’d with the catchphrase, ‘You’ve been juiced’.

For instance, a couple – say, a blonde woman and her waiter friend – are walking up the drive of their Brentwood home one night.

Host OJ jumps out from behind the tree where he has been hiding, brutally stabs both to death and then – to much laughter from the audience – yells out: ‘You’ve been juiced!’

No wonder TV bosses and OJ himself are so excited at the prospect.

A source explains: ‘For example, in one segment a wife admits to her jealous husband that she’s having an affair with another man.

‘Before the husband can compose himself, the doorbell rings. He answers the door and there’s OJ standing in the doorway, smiling like a Cheshire cat.’

Needless to day, OJ then brutally murders the couple, finishing up with his catchphrase: ‘You’ve been juiced!”

Posted: 2nd, April 2004 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink