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Anorak News | England Have A Meier

England Have A Meier

by | 25th, June 2004

‘LOOK OUT!!! Oooeer, that looked painful. David Beckham’s penalty had to leave the Earth’s orbit at some time, it was just unlucky it chose to re-enter the atmosphere as you were holding a scalding hot kettle.

‘It was unfair – you were taller than him’

But your new scar and ball will make nice souvenirs of the England player’s career, a man who has now missed the last three penalty kicks he’s taken for England, all of them vital.

But let’s not slam Beckham, who earns a creditable six out of ten of his effort in the Mirror, a limp four in the Mail, a decent seven in the Express and a further seven in the Sun.

Penalties are a tricky business, and the real villain of the piece was not England’s lacklustre captain, neither was it the team’s inability to get out of reverse gear for large periods of the game – it was Urs Meier.

Crazy name. Crazy guy. And, in the eyes of the Sun, guilty of one of the craziest decisions in footballing history.

The Swiss referee disallowed what did indeed look like a perfectly legitimate 88th-miunute headed goal by England’s Sol Campbell and, in so doing, cost England a berth in the semi finals of Euro 2004.

England were, in the Sun’s considered opinion, ”CHEATED”. England were also “ROBBED” after the referee decided that, at the moment of execution, John Terry had somehow pushed the Portuguese goalkeeper Ricardo.

This was hard luck on England, as too is the Mail’s news that Wayne Rooney has broken a metatarsal bone in his exquisite right foot.

Readers also learn that Rooney cried after England lost.

Which means that the debate as to whether Rooney is the new Gazza (see tears) or the new Becks (see metatarsal) goes on. As do Portugal.

And as does Greg Rusedski in the tennis.

Yes, Britain’s involvement in the summer sport is far from over as the Mirror salutes the Canadian–born star’s victory in Wimbledon’s first round proper.

For the record, and to get all football fans up to speed with tennis matters, our Greg dispensed with Italian Davide Sanguinetti in straight sets.

“Over all I’m pretty pleased with everything,” says our Greg.

“I’ve got an exciting second round match with Schuettler and so it’s going to be a level up from today. But it’s going to be exciting.”

Exciting indeed. And we are all of a quiver at the thought of Greg doing battle with old whatshisname.

But not as excited as we are about the match between Tim Henman and Ivo Heuberger. As the Express says, Tim is ready and relaxed – and Heuberger is Swiss.

Yes, Swiss! Watch out Tim, when those line calls go against you and he cries foul from the other side of the net, keep your cool.

Those Swiss are a wily bunch. And rarely, if ever, neutral…’



Posted: 25th, June 2004 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink