Cum Dancing

‘YOU may have thought that Britain could not produce a duller spectacle than watching the daily lives of the plankton that are the remaining Big Brother housemates.

‘And Kilroy’s sperm edges into the lead…’

But Endemol thinks it can plumb even greater depths and is considering making a programme in which 1,000 men try to convince a woman that they should be the father of her first child.

Provisionally entitled Make Me A Mum, the programme would then hold an on-air sperm race between the woman’s pick and a second donor chosen on the basis of genetic compatibility in which the whole insemination process would be filmed and broadcast.

If you think that doesn’t sound any worse than listening to a conversation between Michelle and Stuart, the Telegraph reports that the idea has encountered fierce opposition.

Anti-abortion group Life said it sounded like prostitution, adding: ‘It’s exploitation with no consideration for the child that may or may not be created.’

But Remy Blumenfeld, creative director of Endemol subsidiary Brighter Pictures, defended the idea, claiming there was ‘a tremendous amount of science to the show’.

Just as Big Brother is actually a psycho-sociological experiment about the pressures of living together for a long period of time in a confined space, so the new show will be all about Darwinism and the process of natural selection.

The same process of natural selection that gave us Jason and all pigs wings and …’

Posted: 23rd, July 2004 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink