Daddy’s Girl
‘HOW much do you love your children?
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| ‘To oblivion and beyond’ |
Once upon a time, proof lay in the rod and the birch. Later, love became an appearance on a Saturday morning kidz TV show, in which good sport dad would have a pint of custard poured down his tights in an act of ritual humiliation.
Now it involves dressing up as a superhero and standing on a ledge outside Buckingham Palace for five hours.
Thats love. Thats real love.
But the papers are not convinced, and Jason Hatchs protest to see his two children by his failed second marriage is being looked upon anew by the Suns front page.
In BATMAN DUMPED, we hear from Gemma Polson, with whom Hatch has a seven-month-old daughter, and learn that shes now split from her hero.
She says that Fathers 4 Justice – the campaign group striving to secure equal rights for fathers when a marriage goes sour has taken over his life.
He was seeing hardly anything of our daughter, says Gemma, a bit rich when the point of his campaign was to allow dads to see more of their children.
The little love, however, can see lots of her dad, since hes plastered over the Express, telling the papers reporters: I would do anything, even die, to see my own children.
But rather than committing an act of hari-kari on the gates of Buckingham Palace, Hatch could always just give Gemma a call and pop home to see little Amelia.
Not that hed be allowed to commit suicide, anyhow, since the police are busy telling the Express that the next person who dresses up like a superhero and storms the Palace will be shot.
The only thing is that its not illegal to trespass on royal property, so being shot for breaking no law may be viewed in some quarters as the cops being a tad overzealous.
Not so, say the police, who argue that terrorists could pose as pranksters to launch attacks.
So if you do see Osama bin Laden pretending to be Aaron Barschak or a mad mullah dressed as Buzz Lightyear, screaming about going to infinity and beyond, best duck.
Or else be killed in the crossfire…’
Posted: 15th, September 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
