Blue Rinse Movies

‘AS one viewer upset by the levels of violence and sex broadcast on TV told Anorak just the other day: “If Mary Whitehouse was alive today she’d be spinning in her grave.”

”What channel’s Red Hot Dutch on again?”

But the blue-rinsed woman whose Clean Up TV Campaign became the powerful National Viewers’ and Listeners’ Association is not alive, for she is dead.

And when she passed, we feared that that no-one would even pick up her baton of righteous indignation.

And then along came pensioners Barbara, Jill and Brenda. From Barbara’s cottage, the three crusaders against sexually explicit material in the media fight the good fight.

And you can watch them hard at it on Channel 4’s Don’t Look Now…as the trio hunt out all the upcoming week’s filth and tell you how best to avoid it.

And for anyone venturing abroad – or overseas, as it was known when dear Mary was among us – these three compile a DVD chart giving a rundown of the latest Hollywood and European filth to avoid.

And in an instant you see the wheeze. This is TV produced by the boy in the fourth form who borrowed the school’s video tape of Roman Polanski’s Macbeth and returned it with a fuzzy bit where Lady Macbeth’s breasts used to be.

Here is the show produced by the boy who wore out dad’s copy of Carry On Camping.

But now the lad’s grown up, got a job in telly and produced a show he’d have paid with his lung to see.

Only, he’s too late – his target audience are busy hunched over their PCs “doing their homework”.

And the only people watching are “outraged of Wolverhampton” and her good gentleman husband…’

Posted: 2nd, November 2004 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink