Millers’ Dossing
‘THE battle for The Vic drags on, and just like the 100 Year War, no-one is remotely interested. You know a soaps in trouble when not even the murder of one of the longest serving characters can deliver an interesting storyline.
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| Sam and her future |
As Den slowly rots under the cellar floor of The Vic, Chrissie and Sam are fighting it out for the pubs ownership and for control of Zoe. Chrissie has convinced Zoe that it was she who actually killed Den. Sam found that out, and has been trying to blackmail Chrissie into handing over the Vic.
But they both need to be careful because Zoe is the weakest link in this murderous chain, and shes already threatening to call the police. I cant live with the guilt any more, she sobbed to Chrissie, who hastily tried to pack her off to Spain before Sam managed to convince her to stay.
This week, though, Sam decided that she wasnt interested in taking over the Vic anymore after she got a phone call from Andys solicitor telling her that Andy had left her something in his will.
Unfortunately for Sam, the something turned out to be his wedding ring, with a message from beyond the grave to sell it so you can get your roots done. Bizarrely, Andy had left the bookies to Dennis and his house to Pat and requested that his other assets go to the local dogs home – no, not to the Slaters but an actual dogs home.
Sam was understandably upset and is now even more determined to get her hands on Chrissies assets, so to speak.
Elsewhere in Walford, the secret behind Keiths long-term skiving was revealed: he cant read or write. Id rather people fort I was lazy rather than fick he told Rosie. Unfortunately for Keith, people still think hes both.
The Millers have been found guilty of benefit fraud and Rosie is at her wits end – which lets face it, wouldnt have taken her very long to reach. The situation is so desperate that Keith even went to the job centre, but not being able to read any of the job notices on display obviously didnt get very far.
Do we suspect that the BBC are gearing themselves up for another worthy EastEnders storyline complete with helpline numbers – which obviously for people who cant read are about as useful as a nicotine patch for Pete Docherty.
Most distasteful storyline of the week has to be Sonia and Martins hilarious bedroom antics. The newly weds are finding living with Pauline somewhat constricting.
Pauline complained to them that their bedroom antics were keeping her awake at night, so Dot bought them a TV for their bedroom to drown out the noise. Its probably best not to dwell on why Dot knows tips for hiding bedroom noises.
But the funniest part of this storyline is the way that Martin has completely failed to notice that his wifes chest has doubled in size overnight. Sonias now walking around with two beach balls stuffed down her top. Perhaps shes hoping for a part time job as a Jade Goody impersonator.’
Posted: 8th, March 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
