One Over The After Eight

‘“JESSIE snorted coke for breakfast,” says the Sun’s front-page headline.

This is the tale of “cocaine-crazed” Jessie Wallace, former EastEnders’ clown-faced harridan, as told by “disgusted” ex-cop Dave Morgan.

Says Dave, who used to date the actress and has a 17-month-old daughter Tallulah with her: “Her problems destroyed us. I loved her – now I hate her.”

This is all interesting stuff, and will doubtless form a fascinating part of Tallulah’s family album. But why now? Why is Dave telling us about his former lover’s antics now?

Could it be that he wants to put the record straight? He says that he is sick of being branded an “evil low-life parasite” by his ex. “It makes me livid when she portrays me as some kind of scrounger,” says he. “All my friends see her for what she is – a horrible and mean woman.”

Or is it part of his bid to gain access to the daughter he has not seen since August last year?

Or could it be that with Wallace no longer on our TV screens, this is all part of some attempt to revive her career?

Well, the drugs stories have done no damage to “cocaine” Kate Moss’s earning potential. As the Mail says, Moss has just signed a £500,000 contract with Calvin Klein, meaning her earnings are now more than double what they were one year ago. Since the tales of her drug taking broke, Moss has picked up contracts worth an estimated £9.4million.

Sure Wallace is more poison ivy than Moss – while Moss, reportedly, kept her stash in a Faberge egg, Dave says Wallace kept hers in an old snuff box.

But these salacious tales of cocaine abuse are putting Wallace back in the limelight. As Dave reports a stoned Wallace telling him: “Come on Dave, cocaine is like having an After Eight.”

Is this product placement? Could Wallace become the new face of the minty confectionary? “Get high with an After Eight,” says Wallace in the advert. “They’re like wafers of coke.”’

Posted: 11th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink