David Gest’s Jungle Crumbs
REMEMBER when David Gest was terrifying?
Gest – who has gone under the knife more times than the Christmas turkey.
Gest – with his cottage-cheese-in-a-ziplock-bag physique.
Gest – the self-confessed friend of Michael Jackson.
Then Gest set up camp in the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! jungle. And rather than scaring off former boyband members, mosquitoes and Jason Donovan, Gest proved to be entertaining and likeable.
We cheered for the former Mr Liza Minnelli – she hoped Gest was “f*****d by a kangaroo and eaten by crocs”.
Gest was a good sport. And had coitus with a kangaroo and dinner with the crocodiles been a task, the feeling is that Gest would have undertaken it with brio and a smile.
We voted for him to win the show. But he didn’t win. The winner was former Busted singer Matt Willis.
But now front-page news. The Sun tells us that more than 30,000 phone votes made for Gest to wear the jungle crown were lost.
The Sun hears from a whistleblower, an executive at the phoneline company Eckoh. She claims another company, Mig, gave them their results too late to figure in the final tally.
This caused Gest to be booted off the show. The honour of making the final three went to Myleene Klass, or, more vitally, Myleene’s white bikini.
As the insider tells us via email: “I can’t believe that there’s been a cock-up with the system like that, so near the end as well. Migs’ system obviously couldn’t handle all the text messages, but it’s their problem not ours so sod it.”
For their parts, ITV, which broadcasts the show, says all votes were counted. And Eckoh says the emails seen by the Sun are a “malicious fabrication”.
It hard to know who to believe. And while ITV sets up a premium-rate phoneline to seek an answer to the question “Was David Gest Robbed? – “Press 1 For Yes; Press 2 for No; Press 3 for Rawl Plugs” – we read on.
And we see on the Mirror’s front page that Gest could be returning to our screens as a judge on the X Factor.
What a spooky coincidence, say you, that Gest should appear on the front page of two pages in two seemingly unrelated stories.
Says an X Factor source in the Mirror: “David was a real hit on I’m A Celeb… so they already know how popular he is with the audience.”
Indeed. And if the whistleblower is correct, Gest is more popular than many of us had previously thought…
Posted: 13th, March 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (3) | TrackBack | Permalink
