Tally-Ban!: Prince Harry In Iraq
FRESH from manoeuvres at Stamford Bridge and nightclubs various, Prince Harry is now in grave danger. But the question is not why but who will get him first?
The Times says Iraqi insurgents are plotting to trip Harry up. Last week the enemy killed two British soldiers in Iraq. And this, says the Times on its front page, was a “dry run” for an attempt on Prince Harry’s life.
Harry is set to patrol parts of Iraq in a Scimitar reconnaissance vehicle, of the same type in which the soldiers were killed by a roadside bomb. That was the fist time British soldiers have been killed in a Scimitar as result of enemy action, says the paper.
But will the insurgents really get at young Cornet Wales? Or will sections of the Iraqi police, turned onto the idea of kidnapping and then ransoming Harry, get him first?
The Times says British soldiers are under orders not to wander around their Iraqi-run Camp Sparrowhawk in Maysan Province base for fear of being kidnapped.
But Harry wants to go. The Mail’s front page talks of Harry telling his friends: “I’M NOT AFRAID TO DIE.”
And you already know why not. No virgins await Harry. He’s not martyr. But as this “confidant” says: “Harry is not afraid to die, because of his own mother’s tragic death.”
And so another possibility enters the fray – Harry will forget to put on his seatbelt and perish in a car accident.
Harry in Iraq is looking like an episode of the old cartoon Dastardly And Muttley, with Harry trying to outwit and survive the Vulture Squadron. (“Nab him – jab him – tab him – grab him – stop that Harry now!”)
But this is no joke. There are many ways to die in a war zone, none of them pleasant. Should Harry be allowed to go?
“HARRY: LET ME FIGHT OR ELSE,” says the Sun’s front page. Or else..? Or else Harry will: a) dye his hair mauve, b) scream and scream until he is sick or c) make his own way to Iraq, wander across the border with Iran and shoot the first thing he sees?
Harry says if he is not permitted to fight he will quit the Army. He is no ceremonial goat. He is a trained fighter.
So let him go. The presence of Cornet Wales in the ranks will add a renewed sense of purpose and cohesion to operations.
At the very least it will give the fighting forces something new to talk about?
And if Harry can be issued with a non-firing gun and some melting boots, the other soldiers may soon get the quality equipment they crave…
Posted: 27th, April 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink
