Melon-Knees: Melanie Griffith Gathers Herself
MELANIE Griffith’s knees follow you around the room.
Having spent what the Express calls a “fortune” on facial surgery, the paper says the Hollywood actress’s lower half is letting her down.
Griffith, a veteran of collagen injections and breast implants, is pictured wearing white shorts and trainers. “A shame about the knees,” says the Express.
“Cut-offs reveal the crinkles in Miss G’s knees,” says the Mail’s headline.
Melanie’s spare and movable upper portions have trickled like down to her knees. From there, we imagine them running down to her ankles. Finally, they mass around her toes, where the skin can be pulled tight, coloured and fashioned into a snug pair of thigh-high boots.
The paper hears from plastic surgeon Apostolos Gaitanis. Says he: “The knees are a huge problem area for women because the skin is thin and so ages badly.”
Readers are introduced to the knee lift. And the liposculpture, in which fat is sucked out from around the knees.
But the Mirror operates at the cutting-edge of knee know-how and in a piece entitled “Whose knees are these?” allows knee enthusiasts to look over a bevy of knees.
And we advise Griffith to take knees number ‘2’. We have little idea to whom these knees belong but urge Melanie to get them at any price. They should then be grafted onto her own legs.
And in the spirit of recycling, we suggest Griffith employs her own elephantine knees as a hat stand or cheek implants…
Posted: 11th, May 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
