LA Beckhams: Rebecca Loos On David Beckham And Meeting Victoria
REBORN in the USA, David Beckham is touched down in Los Angeles. He is telling the world that he has come to bring football to the masses, a soccer missionary to deliver the light of goalless draws, jumpers for goalposts and a new kits retailing at £49.99 to the non believers.
“Go Dave!” yell the British hacks massed in sunny LA. “We lurve, you Day-vid,” they chime as one. “We love you for getting us out of watching Wigan reserves take on Melton Mowbray FC in pre-season jog about. Hallelujah!”
And Dave smiles. He reads his autocue. He leads his three sons into the rosy-fingered dawn, the boys identically dressed in red-and-white striped tops, beige shorts and shaved heads. “Soccer it to ’em, Becks!” says the Mirror’s front-page headline.
He Loves his Wife
And there is Posh. David loves his wife. He loves his wife. He loves his wife.
He does not love Rebecca Loos, who tells the Star: “I saved the Beckhams’ marriage.”
So he should love her? He shoots. Rebecca saves. Everyone scores a magazine deal. It’s the perfect goal.
And here in the Star to explain all is Ms Loos, cupping her hands over her breasts and digging her thumbs lightly into her enhanced nipples.
“In a way they should be glad it happened,” says Loos, “it’s made them stronger. They even went on to have another kid. Everything happens for a reason, even bad things.”
And: “No one knows what goes on between two people. But if they are happy – and they seem to be – then it’s worth it.”
Rebecca is too modest. We can know what goes on between two people so long as one party records conversations in the form of a Bext message, stores it on her mobile phone and shows it to Sky news in a one-on-one interview spectacular.
What Next?
“There are plenty of gorgeous girls in LA,” says Loos, “I don’t know whether he’s going to be a good boy.”
And she is going to LA. She spends one week a year there. What if Loos should happen upon Dave? “I don’t know what I’d say if I bumped into the Beckhams,” says she. “But I’m sure Victoria would talk to me.”
After all, Loos and Posh are kindred spirits. She tells us that “he is the only one to blame. He knew what he was doing when he seduced me… It was all down to him.”
David Beckham scores and gets the assist(ant). Who says you can’t have it all. Not David Beckham. Go Dave! And don’t turn around lest you lock eyes with Rebecca’s naked chest…
Posted: 13th, July 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (14) | TrackBack | Permalink