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Madeleine McCann: Situations Vacant

by | 13th, September 2007

beckham-mccann.jpgSITUATIONS vacant: PR for Gerry and Kate McCann. Must own passport, be versed in Brand McCann and be waiting for the opportunity to make your mark on a small, but thriving Portuguese resort.

As the Guardian reports, the McCanns’ current PR, Justine McGuinness, decided to step down.

However, as reported, she is believed to have assured the McCanns that she will stay in place if a replacement cannot be found.

McGuinness says her departure, as reported, is because the McCanns “have been ordered to remain silent because of the changing nature of the investigation and she feels she cannot help them further”.

And she’s busy, “working 18 hours days for a number of weeks now”, according to a source.

The paper says the McCanns are looking for “big hitter”, an unfortunate turn of phrase, given some of the more salacious speculation surrounding the case. And evidence that the PR cannot arrive soon enough.

A Big Hello! 

Now the coverage has become more negative, the McCanns need new a broom.
And, as the Guardian notes, the leading candidate thought to be former News of the World and Hello! editor Phil Hall.

He tells the Guardian: “I have spoken to them a number of times and offered advice and [help] assessing the situation and what they are doing going forward and whether they need someone full time or part time.”

He goes on: “We are discussing the way forward. I have not been hired … and I gather they are talking to other people.”

If Hall of Hello! gets the job we can surely look forward to reading about how Mrs McCann looks radiant in her organza silk gown as her husband, the handsome Gerry, walks among the petunias at Florence’s exclusive Villa Borgia, every inch the statesman and leading operatic tenor.

Of course, all things have a price. So how much will the PR get? “What, when they call up, do I ask them, ‘how much?’ Of course not. They are very nice people,” says Hall, already, it seems, on message.

So he doesn’t know. Less than a million? And does the contract include of forbid the rights to any book deal?

As the Guardian says, Mr Hall’s scoops include securing for Hello! the rights to Victoria Beckham’s official autobiography, Learning to Fly.

Indeed. It is beyond parody. As that book goes:

“’Daddy! I’m going to be killed.’

‘No, you’re not, Victoria. I’m right behind you. I’ll look after you.’
I can’t see him. We’re too close together, jammed in by the crowd. But I can feel his hand on my shoulder, and his hand and his voice are just enough to keep me from screaming. Calm, in control, like he always is. Not like my mum who lives off her nerves. When people say, who do you take after, I say, my dad. But when I panic like this I know I’m like my mum.”

Whoever gets the job will have to earn their money…

Madeleine McCann: a tale of speculation



Posted: 13th, September 2007 | In: Madeleine McCann Comments (331) | TrackBack | Permalink