Taliban Speak With Birmingham Accents
“SPY planes hear Taliban talk in Midlands accent.” It’s “TALIBRUM”.
Can it be that the listening devices attached to RAF spy-in-the-sky surveillance machines mutate incoming chatter into a flat Birmingham burr?
Does the voiceover artist required to translate goings on in Kabul hail from Washwood Heath? Or is Brummie the spy’s accent of choice, the result of intensive studies proving it the one best suited to international skulduggery, the downward intonation at the end of most sentences acting as a silencer?
“Oy kwoyt loik it steered,” says Birming’am’s James Bond ordering his martini bianco.
The Republic
It turns out that Brummie is not all and the RAF has picked up the sounds of a Yorkshire accent.
This dialect is, we suggest, best served for more forceful exchanges, when a Taliban is making his point vigorously in the manner of a bearded and less aggressive Harvey Smith.
A source, however, tells the Sun that the Taliban are “reverting to English when they couldn’t remember the Afghan Persian or Pashto”. This, says the RAF’s man in the air, is evidence that the fighters are natives of West Bromwich and Bradford, a sign that British citizens are fighting for the enemy.
That is entirely possible. But no proof is given.
And Anorak wonders if what the RAF is listening to is less a plot than it is evidence of the enemy’s limited broadcast entertainment, chiefly episodes of Crossroads and international showjumping from Hickstead..?
Posted: 11th, February 2008 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
