HooRAH Henry, Prince William’s Oasis Is Shattered
PRINCE William and Prince Harry are RAHS.
This, as Grazia magazine tells us, means they are “Royals And Heiresses”. They are HooRAH Henrys. No big departure for HooRAY Henrys (Rich And Young), but on such details are the reputations of magazines made.
Wills and Harry Baseball Cap are also “the new Noel and Liam”, believed not to be Irish footballer of yore Liam Brady and resurgent TV personality Noel Edmonds, rather Liam and Noel Gallagher, popular singers and champions of wrapping up in a chill wind. (“Hoods and Anoraks on, kids!” is their catchphrase.)
No sign of a scarf and woolly hat for Wills on the Mail’s front page, but he is sat before 14 bottles of alcopops and two pints of lager.
Can it be that having dabbled in the City, the Armed Forces and as a peacenik, Wills is now learning to be a hellraising rock ‘n’ roll star?
“William and the clubber slashed with a bottle,” comes the headline. And we wonder some more.
“Our future king on a boys’ night out. An hour later in the same nightclub, a reveller is slashed with a broken bottle.”
Are the two things linked? “ROYAL EXCLUSIVE,” announces the Star on its front page. “WILLS GLASS ATTACK HORROR.”
Wills is on a “larger and vodka bender”. He is “caught up in a vicious attack”. There is a “bloodbath”.
To the Barracuda club in Newquay, Cornwall.
“I WAS BOTTLED AT PRINCE WILLIAMS £1-A-DRINK PUB.” So says the Mirror’s front-page headline, which makes it seem as though Wills is drinking for research purposes, having opened a nice little boozer on the south coast.
But look out! Dan O’Callaghan has “just spotted Wills” and his. Dan is having a row with two men. A broken bottle is introduced to his face. And 25 stitches later (35 stitches, says the Mail) he is speaking to the Mirror.
“I watched Wills down £1 drinks… then thugs did THIS to my face,” says the headline, a neat surmising of the night’s events.
Are the two events linked? Did looking at Wills earn Dan a bottling, or glassing as the Star has it, exclusively?
In what way are the two things connected? We need to know. This one could run and run…
Posted: 14th, February 2008 | In: Grazia, Royal Family, Tabloids Comments (3) | TrackBack | Permalink
