Soldiers And Arabs: War In The UK And The Paintball Jihad
FORGET cowboys and Indians. The new playground fight is between squaddies and Arabs.
A company called Zulu 1 Tactical Airsoft Simulations is offering you the chance to prepare for the Clash of Civilisations by dressing in Army fatigues and shooting at opponents dressed in traditional shemagh head-dresses.
“What did you do in the war, daddy?” asks the little lad dandling on his papa’s knee. Well, says Simon, a retired accounts executive from Basingstoke, “I fired plastic pellets into Uncle Steve’s face.”
At the battleground, Darren Howells, 42, and Peter Jenkins, founders of the company, deny racism, claiming the head-dresses are the “easiest way to tell who the enemy are”.
Indeed, Anorak recalls those scenes of UK-based jihadists training for total warfare by rolling about in the Lake District and paintballing.
Zulu 1 Tactical Airsoft Simulations offers the riposte to such priapic goings on, and should make one and all appreciate the truth that no side has the monopoly on sad men who like to feel important in khaki.
Indeed, if the jihdists and fantasists can just agree on whether the final conflict should be waged with pellets or balls of coloured paint, we can get on with the settling matters.
It’s An Outrage
But it is all an “outrage” (Mail). Really it is. There is “anger” among “furous Muslim leaders” says the Sun.
The paper hears from the Muslim Association of Britain executive member Mokhtar Badri. Says he: “They could use any colour or dress to tell between teams. Using Arab dress is shortsighted and foolish.”
He tells the Mail: “Any sort of game that associates guns and violence with a particular culture is clearly wrong.” Such is the madness of his swivel-eyed fury.
On Mr Badri’s point, it should be noted that the white men who run the show are not representative of the greater White non-Arab community, just as not all Arabs are Muslim.
For his part, Mr Jenkins says the use of the shemaghs adds authenticity to the experience and they were frequently used by British soldiers.
The push for relissm is given added weight when readers hear Jenkins say that pellets only travel 30 to 40 metres.
For added realism, weekend fighters should melt their boots and use armour fashioned from old egg boxes…
Posted: 8th, April 2008 | In: Tabloids Comments (7) | TrackBack | Permalink
