Vinnie Jones Lends Paul Gascoigne A Mahogany Hand
WHEN that photo was taken of Vinnie Jones massaging Paul Gascoigne’s tackle who would have predicted the men’s careers would develop as they have done?
Gascoigne was to don a pair of comedy breasts, tell Norway to f*** off and score a wonderful goal in Euro /96 just to get a drink.
Jones went on to star in a TV advert for the AA and become the one Wimbledon player to go to Hollywood for anything other than a holiday.
Had only some agent spotted Gascoigne’s comedic talents the man could now be fronting Paul Gascoigne’s TV Burp on the magic box.
Do we laugh when reading the Sun’s headline “Gazza was begging in street…he tried to buy a Ferrari then his trouser fell down”? Take care with your reaction. Gazza was wearing no underwear, says the car dealer.
But instead of his own show on Saturday night telly Gascoigne was allowed to play football for Spurs, beat up his wife and, as the Star says, try to drown himself in a bath.
We should not laugh.
The Star talks of Gazza needing psychiatric care for good, or as the front-page headline puts it: “GAZZA PUT AWAY FOR LIFE.”
And there’s the Star’s news that Vinnie Jones is to play a movie psycho. In the Hollywood film Mahogany, Jones roams the New York subway murdering passengers without uttering a word.
No nonsense Jones was never one for backchat to the referee, and there is a certain degree of typecasting in the role. But what of Gascoigne?
Might Jones extends the blood-stained hand for friendship and invite Gazza to co-star, perhaps allowing the troubled Geordie to belch as his penis is ripped clean off?
Come on, Vinnie, give Gazza a hand…
Posted: 6th, May 2008 | In: Back pages, Celebrities, Tabloids Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink
