Shannon Matthews: Fags, Lags And Craig Meehan
THE Sun says that a “tobacco bounty” has been placed on Craig Meehan’s head, “stepdad” No. 349831b to Shannon Matthews.
The reward for beating up Meehan is, reportedly, ten ounces of “prison baccy – worth about £8.”
Meehan is worth much more than Karen Matthews, whose head commands the princely sum of ten Lambert & Butler fags.
Says a source at Armley jail, Leeds: “Tobacco is a precious commodity inside. There are people who will do anything to get it, including attacking other inmates.”
The tabloids are fond of publishing insights into life behind bars, a polarised place where prisoners are either sipping cocktails in cushy cells or sat 32 to a cell, injecting pureed rats and listening to Tannoy broadcasts of “Conversations With Sir Cliff – Musing On Life, Jesus and Tennis”.
The inside insider adds of Meehan: “He looked very odd and creepy. All he did was sit in his cell, smoking and watching TV.”
Meehan already has cigarettes, you see. Although how he got them is unsaid. But we are assured that prisoners will do anything for a smoke…
Meehan has now been moved to a new jail, where, one imagines, tobacco is in more plentiful supply.
Posted: 23rd, May 2008 | In: Reviews, Tabloids Comments (10) | TrackBack | Permalink