Hair He Comes: How Scottish Is Donald Trump?
DONALD Trump, he of the tsunami hair, the self-styled “ultimate definition of the American success story” (source: Trump’s CV), the man who budding entrepreneurs can smell like with a spritz off his Obviously, Donald Trump: The Fragrance, is in Scotland.
Trump is in Aberdeen now to argue the case for a £1bn golf resort and housing project. But before there, he stopped off in Stornoway, birthplace of his mother Mary Anne MacLeod,
Was it a cynical stunt? The Telegraph manages to unearth a disgruntled local, one Angus Nicolson, to tell us: “He is tartan-ing up his Scottish roots to get planning approval and that does not go down well.”
What chance Nicolson is right? “Zero.” says Trump. Psk! He’s here to meet his family. The Guardian sees Cases stamped Trump: How to get rich and Never give up being carried off his jet and loaded into the boot of the island’s only Porsche Cayenne 4×4.
How to get rich is now required reading on the island, and you can hear the locals greeting each other with commands to “Be Tenacious”; “Play Golf”; “Be Optimistic, but Always Be Prepared for the Worst”.
Trump presented the TV show The Apprentice in the US, and Stornoway is now Apprentice Island, a place full of no-shit takers leaning on gates while belting out phrases like “I stomp on the face of failure”; “I’d kill any one – ANYONE – to get to the top”; and “Only losers can spell loser”.
The Guardian observes Trump’s “artfully contrived hairdo” (“It briefly hung in the air like an impromptu halo”), and begins to work out how Scottish he is.
The Guardian says his trip last “180 minutes”. He is a three-hour Scot.
In the Scotsman, his trip lasted “ just over two hours.”
Trump remained for a two-minute tour of his mother’s family dwelling, a stone clad home, but soon to be covered in a rich film of gold and mirrored plutonium. The Guardian says the visit lasted 97 seconds. The Herald counters with 120 seconds.
And, as ever with Trumps, there is no little controversy.
Posted: 10th, June 2008 | In: Broadsheets, Celebrities Comments (15) | TrackBack | Permalink
