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Barbie’s Doll: Helen Mirren Is The Cocaine Queen

by | 1st, September 2008

HOW does HRH Helen Mirren keep her figure?

Says Helen Mirren in GQ:

“I loved coke. I never did a lot, just a bit at parties.”

Of course, cocaine does not always get you the part, nor does it always make your breasts grow, your hips stay slim-yet-shapely and your hair turn blonde.

But might it help?

Says Dame Helen: “Dope always made me feel miserable and paranoid and unhappy.”

One wonders if the Queen could learn from her alter ego, and have a word with her youngest scions, or dye here hair?

But if the cocaine was good, why did Mirren stop taking it?

“But what ended it for me was when they caught Klaus Barbie, the Butcher of Lyon, in the early eighties.”

Was he her dealer?

“He was hiding in South America and living off the proceeds of being a cocaine baron. And I read that in the paper, and all the cards fell into place and I saw how my little sniff of cocaine at a party had an absolute direct route to this horrible man in South America.”

Jeez! How much was Mirren paying for her coke?



Posted: 1st, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Royal Family Comments (13) | TrackBack | Permalink