Iowahawk Says ‘Watcha Cocks’
Let me first reassure you that I am totally down with your British culture and wacky lingo, thanks to several visits to London and my extensive collection of Benny Hill videotapes. I am also a big fan of your popular moptop skiffle combos like the Beatles. I have to say they are really “fab gear”! Yes, there are differences in the way we talk, but I have learned they can often be overcome through careful word substitutions, like “bonnet” for “hood” or “boot” for “trunk” or “bloody” for “f***ing.” For example, a typical Chicago newspaper headline might be better translated for you as “F***ing Torso Found Inside Bonnet’s Boot.”
Another key area of language difference seems to revolve around the buttocks region. I am told that you refer to this area as the “arse,” as contrasted with our all-American “ass.” But I think that we can all agree that nothing complements the female buttocks region like an interesting pair of “knickers,” or, as we call them, “panties.” Especially if the wearer has the kind of “junk in the boot” that makes you want to dial her up for a “trunky call.”
In the matter of politics you have “Tories” and “Labour” where we have “Republicans” and “Democrats”; just as our “lawyers” must pass the “bar exam,” I’m sure your “barristers” must pass some sort of “pub quiz.” In America we call our stupid white racists “crackers,” where I believe you refer to them as “scones” or “crisps” or something. But these minor language quirks are nothing compared to the many things we have in common. For example, did you know we also have a new Stalinist dictator, and he also turns out to be Brown?
Posted: 17th, November 2008 | In: Key Posts Comments (49) | TrackBack | Permalink
