Angelina Jolie’s Lost Sex Diaries, Brad Pitt’s Contents Revealed
ANGELINA Jolie’s “LOST DIARIES” have been found. And the National Enquirer has the news on what Ange wrote about “BRAD, JEN & HER KINKY SEX LIFE”.
Once inside the magazine, we realise that the diaries have not been found by the Enquirer. But not to worry because the word “diary” enables the Enquirer to make a good guess at what these diaries contain.
They contain “intimate details about her sex life and revels her innermost feelings about partner Brad Pitt”.
They contain “dates” in chronological orders, notes on “public holidays” and very possibly a table that converts decimal measurements into metric and then lists all the capitals of ALL the nations, including Shiloh’s native NAMIBIA!
A source explains:
“Angie is absolutely terrified. Ever since she was a young girl, she has made a daily habit of writing down her deepest thoughts and feelings… Angie knows how embarrassing it would be for Brad, Jen – and anyone else she’s ever secretly dished on – if her deepest personal thoughts are made public. It’s driving her crazy trying to find them.”
The source says Angie has “looked everywhere” for her diaries. But given her travels, there’s a lot of everywhere to look at. And then there is the speculation as to what’s in them, and what isn’t.
Anorak has compiled five things that could be in the diaries:
Angie’s secret lust for Jennifer Aniston
Angie’s recurring dream of being a flying ant
Angie’s doodle of a cockroach playing the bagpipes
Angie’s inability to spell “discombobulate”
Angie’s belief that the Pope can be turned
Now read on…
Posted: 8th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, National Enquirer Comments (2) | TrackBack | Permalink
