Dancing On Ice: Heather Mills’ And Other Stars Of Casualty
DANCING On Ice is to the reality TV schedules what American Football is to British sports fans: you know it exists but it’s best ignored.
On this year’s show:
Danniella Westbrook (I’m a Celebrity; Get Me Out of Here!) landing face first in a rink of powdered white crystals
Gordon Ramsay’s wife Tana going for the sympathy vote and inviting offensive personal comments in sequins
Bobby Davro: (Come Dine With Me; Hole in The Wall)
Hilary Jones: The GMTV doctor talking to viewers already propped up on prescription drugs, Hilary Jones
Someone called Hayley Tamaddon (Soapstar Superstar; Sopastar Superchef)
Sharron Davies (Gladiators; Superstars)
Gary Lucy (All Star Mr & Mrs; All Star Family Fortunes; All Star Desperation)
An actor called Kieron Richardson (if you have to ask he musty be on Hollyoaks)
Simon Cowell’s jobbing ex-lover Sinitta
Heather Mills (Dancing With The Stars; Divorcing Paul McCartney).
All eyes on Mills, of course, who is said to be earning an extra £10,000 “danger cash” to have her false leg adapted for the ice.
Suddenly the show is worth watching. Dancing On Ice is part of the celebrity cull. The thought of a Mills’ blade coming detached from her superstructure and reducing the UK’s Celebrity Mountain is at once terrifying and alluring.
Someone somewhere might be watching this show for the skating. Everyone else is watching to see who enters casualty first…
8116471
Posted: 22nd, December 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink
