Dancing On Ice: Circling the Pan Of Life With Sharron Davies And Jason Gardiner
SHARRON Davies, star of leaving-the-audience-cold pro-celeb Dancing On Ice is crap. She is poo. She is a dump on the leg of humanity. The woman who achieved Olympic glory in the pool is a **** racing the viewers around life’s U-bend.
Hey, this is not us talking. Ofcom has heard the views of the show’s Judge Jason Gardiner – he compared Sharron Davies’s performance to “faecal matter“. Ofcom that it’s okay.
This is family telly and comparing Sharron Davies to a shit is all good clean fun. Jason Gardiner does not talk shit. And that too is an official fact.
Says Gardiner, whose staking prowess is only better by that of his fellow judges Emma Bunton and Michael Ball:
“It was like watching faecal matter that won’t flush – it goes around and around and around and in the end it doesn’t go anywhere.”
Fact: Gardiner is Australian, a land where the turd triple axels the other way!
Ofcom hears over 400 moans from the viewers at home that Gardiner’s calling Davies droppings and rules that the judge is “well established as the acerbic ‘nasty’ judge” on the show, and the comparison played up to his “pantomime villain” image.
For the record the full judgement went:
“OK, I’m giving you a 2 for improved leg lines and arm lines – absolutely – but for me this is also about performance and your skating is on one level; and I don’t know what it was – it was just like – the brown costume and everything.
“It was like watching faecal matter that won’t flush – it goes around and around and around and in the end it doesn’t go anywhere. You’ve got to give me a performance level, there’s got to be some sort of a journey with you.”
You need to find a plunger to shove on the turd and push it on its way. Jason, over here, mate…
Posted: 23rd, February 2010 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink
