Magic Santa Monica Cops Turn Lindsay Lohan’s Breath Mint Into Cocaine
HEAR the one about the policeman who thought the white substance on Lindsay Lohan’s Clinique sun card was a crushed breath mint?
TMZ tells readers:
Cop Mistook Lindsay’s Cocaine for Breath Mint
Did he? Was it cocaine?
The Santa Monica Police report says the officer “discovered a folded Clinique sun care card with an unknown substance caked on to the surface of the card in Lohan’s right rear pocket“.
Anything caked on Lohan is worthy of investigation – mud, Calum Best, wood glue, whatever…
“Some of the white substance fell to the floor. I used my foot to see what had fell but thought nothing of it. I did not recognize the substance attached to the card and initially thought the substance was a wet crushed breath mint.”
Top police work – never admit you know what drugs look like: it makes people wary of you. But what happens next is just odd:
“I put the card into the jail trash can next to the booking windows. I was looking at the floor and began to recognize the substance as resembling powder cocaine. I then recovered the card from the trash.”
You threw the crushed breath mint into the rubbish bin at the police station and then you thought it was cocaine? The magic police rubbish bin turned a smashed up tictac into cocaine! A million black men on drugs charges nod. It’s not policing – it’s the kind of magic policing that makes a celebrity bust compelling.
The cop then reached into the bin and retrieved the “evidence”. But the stuff was now contaminated and Lohan was done for drink and not drugs.
Tomorrow, we see how a copper makes his sergeant’s drunken run in with the traffic division vanish…
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Posted: 30th, June 2010 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink
