Power Balance For Imbalanced Celebrities Like Shaquille O’Neal (But Not Larry David)
WITH Power Balance you can finally toss away your red Kabbala string and set about your wrist a device “infused with healing and restorative powers”.
Shaquille O’Neal has one on his wrist. David Beckham has four – which makes him four times as powerful as Shaq. But only Shaq has provided a testimony we can experience. And, yes, this is the same Shaq who appeared in an episode of Larry David’s Curb Your Enthusiasm – so it took us a few reads to realise that he might not be taking the piss:
“I don’t really do a lot of testimonials, but this really works! I came across Power Balance when someone did the test on me. That night, while playing for the Phoenix Suns, there were about three of my teammates with the product on and we won that game by 57 points! I kept feeling something when I wore the bracelet, so I kept wearing it. When I took it off I went back to normal. I’ve been wearing the bracelet ever since. I want to do everything to get the slightest advantage; wristbands, necklaces, t-shirts, band-aids, everything and anything we can get our hands on. I’m here to tell you it works!”
And it can work for you for just £29.99. The inventor of the silicon band – “Surgical Grade Silicone!” – with the hologram in the middle is Josh Rodarme. (He might have been wearing one when he invented the thing.)
Says he:
“Everything in nature has a set frequency. The body has a frequency and things which cause negativity to the human body – like cellphones and radiowaves – break down its natural healing frequency. My brother and I worked out a way of putting good frequencies into our holograms so they balance out the body.”
Anorak advises waiting for the diadem version that can be worn about the head, or if you’re a Hollywood celebrity, the waist…
Posted: 3rd, September 2010 | In: The Consumer Comments (8) | TrackBack | Permalink
