Jennifer Aniston’s A-Ha Moment: Muscle Memory Over A Chinois Salad

JENNIFER Aniston, a middle-aged woman on whom non-existent attributes are piled, is talking to OK! about herself.

Highlights:

“I’m really happy. Really! My version of happiness is where I’m sitting now.”

Even when she is unhappy she is happy!

“You just have to say it’s okay to be in a funk sometimes… You need the light and the dark.”

She says all of her relationships – including the one that ended in divorce and a career for Brad Pitt as Angelina Jolie’s baby carrier – have been “awesome”.

Says he on having kidzzzz?

“I’m not against doing it on my own, if it really led to that place.”

That place being the sperm counter at Bloomingdale’s?

She then says that her split from Brad Pitt was “nobody’s business”. But what about those TV interviews with Oprah, and the time she told Vanity Fair:

When I ask about that gracious, no-one-is-to-blame announcement of their separation, she takes a deep breath.

“What we said was true—”

As I raise my eyebrows, she pauses for a moment, and then adds carefully, “—as far as I knew. We wrote it together, very consciously, and felt very good about it. We exited this relationship as beautifully as we entered it.”

Of course, this is the same poor Jennifer Aniston who told us:

“I feel like it’s no one’s business. I don’t know about your life. I don’t want to, truthfully. It’s not my business. It’s a very strange thing. But somehow it’s like there was some clause somewhere that said, ‘Well, you’re a public person so we get to go into your house and search through your drawers.’ I don’t know who came up with it because I wouldn’t have signed on. I don’t think anybody would have.”

She then adds in OK!:

“I have to eat chips and salsa every now and then… I’m pretty much a protein and vegetables girl. I just had a chinois salad with parsley and mushrooms and salmon… I really don’t eat starches… I ordered a cheeseburger from room service. It was delicious. So fantastic. Awesome.”

Then, privately:

“My body has great muscle memory.”

Adding:

“I actually like working out on an empty stomach.”

OK! wonders: “What’s been tour biggest a-ha moment?”

“This summer I work up in the middle of the night in London…. And I knew I really needed to simplify my life. And along with that came the thought, I should sell my house [her 9,000 sq ft. Beverly Hills home]. I was like, wait, I just built it; it was like my heart, my project, my love, but I had the realisation that it was just too much for me. I’m not that person. I’ve an old house since ’94 and I love it. I might just move back there.”

Jennifer Aniston is single.

A-HA!!!!