Crime is dead: 5 tonnes of Nutella stolen
IN a break from Margaret Thatcher’s death news, this just in: Crime isn’t what it used to be. Remember when people tried to steal trains filled with money? Remember diamond thieves? Remember organised crime in good tailoring? Counterfeiting, glamorous drug barons and ties to the entertainment business?
That’s all gone.
So what are we left with now? Well, over in Germany, thieves have stolen 5 tonnes of Nutella. How lame is that? Now, in fairness, the chocolate spread taken is said to be worth a total of £13,600 and was swiped from a truck in Niederaula. It still lacks glamour though, doesn’t it?
There wasn’t even a Nutella heist as the vehicle was left at an abandoned railway station at the time. How very, very distressing.
Along with the sugary spread, a local police spokesman added that several litres of Red Bull had also been stolen in the same area last month. The culprits are said to have no teeth and eyes the size of bin lids.
The most distressing Nutella news is that you’ve been pronouncing incorrectly all these years. It is pronounced ‘new-tell-uh’ and, if you refuse to believe it, have a look at this from the official Nutella website.
Absolute madness.
Posted: 8th, April 2013 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
