Sugar is bad for you. It must be taxed. In the eyes of Jamie Oliver and anyone who listens to him, tax is a way to punish people. So the price has been raised. Now, let’s ban fruit:

A banana contains four teaspoons of sugar!

An apple contains five teaspoons of sugar!

An pear contains four and a half teaspoons of sugar!

A bunch of grapes contains five teaspoons of sugar!

A slice of watermelon contains four and half teaspoons of sugar!

An orange contains four teaspoons of sugar!

The NHS says “Children should have no more than 19g of sugar a day.” But they should also eat five pieces of fruit a day, including fruit juices.