Drinks All Round!

‘CALLING Alastair Stewart unctuous is like calling him syrupy, crawling, slimy, oily, greasy and plain old revolting. Each word is as appropriate as the next.

‘Who’s this idiot walking out of court?’

And so it is with no hint of anything less than total pleasure that we read of his downfall. Yes, folks, the man who presents the TV show about bad drivers has been banned from driving after being found guilty of drink-driving.

As the Sun announces: ‘Every week on Police, Camera, Action we bring you pictures of disgraceful driving. Today let’s take a look at this idiot, who crashed a powerful Merc while three times the limit…’

Now to go with his many other sobriquets, we, like the Sun, can call this menace on the roads ‘Hypocrite Alastair’.

Over in the Mail, Hypocrite Alastair is seen dressed in the official Police, Camera, Action luminous police-style vest. Which makes him easy to spot.

So if you ever see Alastair taking a drink before getting into his car over the next 30 months – the length of his ban – immediately tell the police.

The sooner we put him behind bars, the safer we’ll all be…

‘

Posted: 2nd, July 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink