Sympathy For The Devil

‘THERE are all sorts of miscreants jostling for space on the front page of this morning’s papers.

The Devil is believed to have used fire and brimstone

Zimbabwean president Robert Mugabe has been given a senior role within the African Union, an organisation set up to promote good governance on the continent.

It is a move that might strike us as akin to putting the Child-Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang in charge of Unicef or Silvio Berlusconi in charge of the European Union.

But the Telegraph reminds us that it is not without precedent – in the 1970s Ugandan dictator Idi Amin was head of the AU’s predecessor, the Organisation For African Unity.

It is not clear whether Saddam Hussein still has ambitions of high office, but the Independent assures us that he is still alive and living near Baghdad.

So claims a former head of Iraqi intelligence – which means, if they’re anything like their British counterparts, that Saddam is either dead or sunning himself on a beach in Brazil.

However, General Wafiq al-Samarrai also claims that with Saddam is Ali Hassan al-Majid, otherwise known as Chemical Ali – a man who we were assured had been killed in the fighting near Basra.

Which disputed war claim leads us neatly on to Tony Blair, whose silhouette appears on the front page of the Guardian against a backdrop that looks remarkably like the fires of Hell.

Of course, this can only be an illusion for we all know that a space for Tony has been reserved in Paradise by the right hand of God.

We can only conclude that Tony has decided to try to effect regime change in Hades itself and bring the Devil’s reign of terror to an end…

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Posted: 14th, July 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink