The Stepford Daughters

‘IN the pursuit of perfection Natasha Bryer has something of a head start on the assorted Armanis, Jordans and Chelseas who, along with their Slovenian maids, make up the celebrity playground.

Blonde ambition

You see perfection is a woman called Tania – and Tania just happens to be Natasha’s mum. Tania also happens to be blonde and an alumnus of her daughter’s school.

So in the race to be perfect (i.e. Tania), Natasha has the right genes, the right blonde hair, the right school and the right amount of celebrity.

She also has the right story to tell. Whereas other children will be only able to talk of childhood trips to Aspen, Monaco and Brent Cross shopping centre, Natasha can tell us all about her birth and the state of her mother’s placenta.

The miracle has every advantage. That’s what Tania calls the girl who spent her fifth birthday party dressed up as Peter Pan and in the company of OK! hacks and snappers – ”my little miracle”.

But the competition to be like Tania is fierce and closing in on the goal of every little girl is Natasha’s sister, Francesca.

Natasha has a rival, but also a friend, as Tania reminds OK!’s avid readers that ”they adore each other so much and are either cuddling or fighting over toys”.

However, we are delighted to learn that Francesca also loves all of Natasha’s friends and was just as excited about the party as the birthday girl.

But neither of them are as excited as Tania. ”Actually,” says Tania, ”the person who enjoys these parties the most is me! It gives me great pleasure planning them and organising every last detail.”

Which makes us wonder why Tania’s Stepford daughters have only one birthday each. It’s high time there was an official birthday for Natasha and Francesca, to complement their actual biological birthdays.

With Tania’s golden touch (surely assisted blonde?), a host of children’s entertainers, a new Kensington eatery keen to get some promotion and OK!’s frosted lights, it’ll be an annual event to cherish.’

Posted: 12th, January 2004 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink