Revolting MPs

‘TONIGHT Tony Blair faces a make-or-break vote on students’ top-up fees.

The Gnome Office

Of the group that he must convert to his enlightened way, the Independent calculates that 78 are committed rebels, while 20 more are wavering, unsure whether or not to join Tony’s flock.

It sure looks like being a close call, since the Times has done some sums of its own and found that Blair is 20 votes short of safety.

‘No Deal,’ says the Times’ headline. ‘Blair Stares Defeat Full In The Face.’

And defeat stares back via the Indy’s front page, which shows the mug-shots of all those ghastly rebels who will do for Tony.

And by virtue of the alphabet, first up is Diane Abbott, described as a ‘serial rebel’.

How Tony must be buoyed by this news! Abbott, who lambasted fee-paying schools and then promptly sent her son to one, can be relied upon to do pretty much the exact opposite of what she promises.

So that’s just 19 votes needed. And in among the possible converts to Tony’s way, the Times spots a whole host of former ministers.

If former chancellor Denis Healey was once savaged by a dead sheep in the human form of his successor Geoffrey Howe, Tony’s about to be mauled to death by a garden ornament (Robin Cook), one of Santa’s helpers (Frank Dobson), and Clare Short, who probably thinks the entire thing is an Israeli plot.

With enemies of such a low calibre, Tony might yet be saved. At least until 12:30 tomorrow when, the Telegraph reports, Lord Hutton will deliver his verdict on the death of Dr David Kelly.

After that, we’ll know more about what lies in store for Tony, and, perhaps, for those who go against him…’

Posted: 27th, January 2004 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink