Lurpak Your Bags

‘HOLD the front page!

There were fears that Douglas was getting too big for his boots

Oh, all right then, hold Page 14. The Express reports two major developments in the wonderful world of advertising.

First up, Vinnie Jones is to be axed as the £250,000-a-year face of Bacardi rum. This is thought to be connected with his recent conviction for a drunken ‘air rage’ assault.

Vinnie’s story is squeezed into a corner to make room for the main news: the axing of a much bigger advertising star – Douglas.

What do you mean, you’ve never heard of him? Of course you know him, he’s been the face of Lurpak for twenty years. Literally the face of Lurpak, because his whole body is made of the stuff.

He’s the butter man who looks a bit like Wallace from Wallace and Grommet, except he wears evening dress instead of an old cardigan. Oh, and he plays a trombone.

Well, the Express remembers him, and they describe him as ‘one of TV’s most recognisable characters’. And if you saw him in the street, he probably would stand out from the crowd.

Anyway, the company feels that ‘the time is right for a fresh, creative approach that reflects the innovations that have taken place with Lurpak’.

So they’re getting in a bunch of nude women to ‘go skinny-dipping in a lake’.

Douglas is to be melted down and fed to asylum seekers.’

Posted: 5th, April 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink