Cor Luvva Duck

‘IT’S pretty clear that not all researchers are on an equal footing.

‘Hadaway and shite, mon’

While some seek to unlock the secrets of the human psyche, other researchers busy themselves in less lofty pursuits.

And so it is with researchers at Middlesex University who have been investigating the different sounds made by ducks.

Thanks to Dr Victoria de Rijke, a lecturer in English, we now know that cockney ducks make a rough ‘shouting’ quack at their mates, what we at Anorak might term a ‘Cor, luvva duck’.

‘The cockney ducks at the city farm were much louder…than the ducks on Trerieve Farm, in Downderry, Cornwall,’ Dr De Rijke tells the Guardian.

This is no less than fascinating stuff, worthy of the paper’s attention. And it’s stuff we might have missed had the good doctor not used her ears so effectively.

‘The cockney quack’, continues Dr Rijke,’ is like a shout and a laugh, whereas the Cornish ducks sound more like they are giggling.’

Laughing, giggling ducks! Wonder what they find so amusing? That’s something Dr Rijke and her team might like to investigate next.

But now to the researcher’s point, namely that ducks are like humans. No, really they are.

‘So it is like humans,’ says De Rijke, ‘cockneys have short and open vowels, whereas the Cornish have longer vowels and speak fairly slowly.’

Dr Rijke now hopes to study the quacking sounds of other ducks from the regions and will be interviewing geordie, scouse and Irish ducks.

She may even take her study overseas. There she’ll learn that Peking ducks are a brittle bunch who sound best when they are being ripped apart by two forks in a Soho restaurant.

And Bombay ducks sound like fish…’

Posted: 4th, June 2004 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink