Shop Of Horrors

‘WHAT do traffic wardens get for handing out lots of parking tickets? “A one-way trip to Hell?” For sure. “To be hated by the world at large?” Guaranteed. “A new kettle in Argos..?”

As the Mail reports, National Car Parks, the country’s biggest parking enforcement agency, is awarding its staff with reward points at the Argos stores.

The company says points are awarded on a range of criteria – punctuality, teamwork and appearance. But the Mail says evidence suggests performance means the number of tickets issued.

As a leaflet explaining the scheme stuck to the forehead of all wardens explains: “When you demonstrate excellence at work, contribute to increased revenue or cost savings, or have gone the extra distance in your efforts, you will be rewarded.”

Over in the Mirror, the Association of British Drivers calls the plan “outrageous”. And the RAC’s Paul Hodgson says: “If you introduce targets, common sense goes. It now means, ‘Can we get points to win prizes?’”

Can it mean anything other than that? But the scheme is in its infancy, and has yet to reward bonus points – ten extra points for clamping a woman with young children, twenty points for issuing a ticket with the driver still in the car; thirty pints for making the driver cry.

But rules are rules. And if you break the parking laws you will be fined. And who can really blame the wardens – Argos is a store that sells all manner of tempting goods, and Christmas is coming.

Although a word of warning to shoppers – next time you’re in Argos, take care to move the moment your number is called. Any lingering may well result in a fine…’

Posted: 27th, October 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink