Susan Boyle: Simple Susie’s New Teeth

SUSAN Boyle Watch: In which Britian’s Got Talent’s Susan Boyle becomes Catherine Zeta Jones and wins a Catholic medal…

There’s Lovely

DID you know that Catherine Zeta-Jones is “desperate to play Susan Boyle on screen”?

The Mail’s Paul Revoir says so:

Miss Zeta-Jones, 39, has apparently asked about the film rights to the singer’s life story and sensational appearance on Britain’s Got Talent.

It is believed that Oscar-winning film director James Cameron, who was behind Titanic, has expressed an interest in a similar project.

A similar project to Titantic, with Boyle on the prow of the doomed ship bring dry humped by Leonardo DiCaprio? All aboard the Good Ship Boyle!

A source on Britain’s Got Talent says of the Zeta-Jones proposal:

“This is one of many requests we have had to play her [Miss Boyle], for movie deals and for stories of her life. All these people are coming out and want to be associated with her. She is the biggest thing in the world. It is mental.”

Hey, this is no time to poke fun at Simple Susie, who is now a bona fide star with ‘people’:

A spokesman for Miss Boyle said she was unwilling to comment.

Deconstructing Susan

But Boyle can speak for herself, telling the Daily Record:

“I’m not stressed and I’m certainly not on the verge of a breakdown. I’ve never felt more positive, it’s all nonsense. All I can say to everybody is some of the stories about me are untrue.

So, she’s not in rehab?

“I’m not going anywhere. I just want to concentrate on singing.”

Let nothing distract from the singing

Singing sensation Susan Boyle is still on course for stardom – and has the dressing gown to prove it. The Britain’s Got Talent favourite yesterday answered the door to the postman in a blue and white star-print gown – Daily Record

Considering she has already made some noticeable changes to her appearance, should Susan Boyle consider whitening her teeth? Maybe she should consider contacting a celebrity dentist for veneers, to achieve that “million dollar smile” synonymous with almost every big-name celebrity? From what I can see in the video from her performance, she has a fairly attractive smile with relatively straight teeth. Is it possible Susan Boyle wears dentures? – Dentistry

Her sensible yet flattering black pencil-skirt dress was lent a feminine air by a polka dot pussybow tie. Teamed with sensible mid-height heels and Susan was ready to face the clusters of photographers gathered outside her home – Daily Mail

Saint Boyle

Now, I know many more notable and famous and accomplished and, well, deserving names may spring to mind. Names that would probably draw more of a crowd, names of people with a lifetime of service behind them, or names that would probably pose fewer problems in terms of Catholic orthodoxy. Say, Pope Benedict XVI. (Though draping a medal on top of his papal pectoral cross seems a little like overkill.) Or, say, Susan Boyle, that awesome YouTube singer, who is not only super-Catholic but would be a huge hit when she belted out the Notre Dame fight song. Or Mother Teresa, who everybody likes, though being dead might be a strike against her if a speech is expected – America Magazine

Dream A Dream

If Scotland’s newest superstar, Susan Boyle, were invited to do a few numbers on the main stage of the Highland Games and a spot at the Pageant on the Castle Esplanade in front of all the clan chiefs and their kilted followers, she might just be tempted. I think we all know she deserves a shot at such a prestige gig – Scotsman

The Grassy Angel

LIKE JFK’s assassination, every-one can remember when they first saw Susan Boyle. If my memory serves me correctly, I was sitting in front of my TV set watching Britain’s Got Talent… – Hugh Reilly, Scotsman

Susan Boyle – all things to all media…

Pictures and Icons:

Susan Boyle Secret Picture Gallery
Pictures: Susan Boyle Naked

Susan Boyle’s New Hair And Face Makeover: Pictures

Susan Boyle’s New Eyebrows

Susan Boyle’s New Image Bikini Body

Susan Boyle Is A Fake: Proof

The Susan Boyle Barbie Doll

Susan Boyle Models Kate Moss

Shy Susan is Armani Dolce...

Disciples

Susan Boyle Joins Tony Blair On American Idol