Tampon tax is over: invest your saving in vagina candles and steamers
Good news, then. The State’s 5% rake on all sanitary products is to end. The sex-based “tampon tax” will be abolished from January. And you can thank Brexit for the end to it. It was an EU directive that meant the tax rate could not fall below 5%. And so long as the UK was in the bloc’s customs union, the country was legally bound to take a cut from every menstruating woman.
If you want to save money til January, best get what the Vagina Monologues termed “a wad of dry fucking cotton”. What you save on branded padding you can invest in other devices, such as the vagina steamer, trailed on Hollywood princess Gwyneth Paltrow’s blog GOOP thus: “You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus.” Afterwards you can see if your date wants to pull on a Hamzat suit and shag in a laboratory.
If things get too clean and you miss the old days, Paltrow also flogs a candle called ‘This Smells Like My Vagina’, which will ensure a fuller sensory experience to anyone dating a Gwyneth Paltrow love doll or indeed Gwyneth Paltrow.
Posted: 7th, March 2020 | In: Money, News Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
