Anorak

Anorak

Anorak - Author Archive

Marianne and the burkini ban

France’s prime minister, Manuel Valls, wants French women to be like Marianne. “Marianne has a naked breast because she is feeding the people,” he declared. “She is not veiled, because she is free! … (read more)

Posted: 31st, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment

Headline of the week: ‘How would you like to enter Miss Southampton?’

 

Spotter: @subedited … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment

Manchester United ‘hero’ Marcus Rashford shames Man City’s ‘obscene’ Raheem Sterling

Do the Press build them up to knock them down? The Sun writes about Manchester United’s Marcus Rashford who “proves he’s a top guy after buying his mum £800,000 home”.

The story … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Back pages, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comments (3)

A giant inflatable cockroach for swimming pool relaxation

Tired of li-los and inflatables that look like dolphins, fish and dinosaurs, why not buy a six-foot cockroach to float on?

 

 

Kangaroo’s Gigantic Cockroach Raft is yours for $29.99.

Spotter: Bored Panda

  … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Facebook bans Stephen Ellcock and his photos of art

Good news. Facebook has reconsidered. The picture of 16th-century theologian Desiderius Erasmus’s fingers is not offensive. When Stephen Ellcock posted the image on his Facebook page, Facebook banned him, suspending him from posting for 30 … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)

University of Iowa’s Athletics mascot Herky the Hawk lacks motional depth

Is the University of Iowa’s Athletics mascot, Herky the Hawk, a little lacking in emotional depth?

 

Botox?

 

“I believe incoming students should be met with welcoming, nurturing, calm, accepting … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Reviews, Sports, Strange But True | Comment

North Korea uses anti-aircraft gun to execute man who fell asleep as the leader spoke

North Korea finds a use for its vast haul of bullets:
Two senior North Korean officials were executed with an anti-aircraft gun in early August on the orders of Kim Jong-un, … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Politicians, Reviews | Comment

Jack Wilshere seeks new Arsenal deal by demanding to leave the club

So, goodbye Jack Wilshere. Arsenal are happy for their midfielder to leave the club on loan. Of course, were a club to offer a loads of money for the England player, … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment

Spurs and Crystal Palace both want Wilfired Zaha on the cheap

The BBC says Crystal Palace have rejected an £18m bid from Tottenham for Wilfried Zaha, 23. Palace want £25m.

Palace chairman Steve Parish says the offer is “ridiculous”.

The Mirror says Crystal Palace striker Christian Benteke … (read more)

Posted: 30th, August 2016 | In: Back pages, Sports, Spurs | Comment (1)

Breaking news: ‘Not serious … just life threatening’

Breaking news from Australia. A man has been attacked. His wounds are ‘not serious…just life threatening”.

 
… (read more)

Posted: 29th, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment

Transfer balls: Arsenal in for Antoine Griezmann, Kostas Manolas and Oliver Burke

Transfer balls: No sooner have Arsenal splashed a huge amount of cash on Shkodran Mustafi (£35m) and Lucas Perez (£17m), than Sky Sports says they are in for the excellent French striker Antoine Griezmann … (read more)

Posted: 29th, August 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment

Chelsea’s new ground held up by bats

The Times says “Chelsea’s new stadium has been delayed by “quiet assassins on the wing”. Surely the noise police don’t have a problem with Chelsea expanding their ground. That place … (read more)

Posted: 26th, August 2016 | In: Chelsea, Reviews, Sports | Comment

Manchester United: Luke Shaw on the tackle that nearly ended his career

Manchester United’s Luke Shaw has been talking with the Guardian. His return from a badly broken leg has been arduous – a double break caused by a tackle when United played … (read more)

Posted: 26th, August 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment (1)

Somerset police seek man who urinated in River

The search goes on for who urinated into the River Cale at Wincanton, Somerset. PCSO Janet Sparkes addressed a meeting of Wincanton Town Council: “Members of public have made us aware of adult … (read more)

Posted: 26th, August 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment

Transfer Balls: ‘shrewd’ Arsenal ‘panic buy’ ‘star’ striker Lucas Perez

Arsenal have hired Lucas Perez. The Mirror says it is a “PANIC BUY”, which is odd because Arsenal are usually criticised for being over cautious in the transfer market.

 

 

The paper goes … (read more)

Posted: 26th, August 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Reviews, Sports | Comment

God tells man to carry a huge cross up Mount Snowdon

The Rio Olympics legacy has not inspired a man from Llandysul in Ceredigion, Wales, to recreate his own version of the Brazilian looming statue of Christ the Redeemer. God has.

 

Living … (read more)

Posted: 26th, August 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment

Man who unlawfully cut down neighbour’s tree caused it to destroy his own home

To Luzerne County, Pennsylvania, where Raymond Mazzarella is upset that sap from a neighbour’s tree is damaging his car. He picks up a chainsaw, cuts down the tree and sees it come down… right … (read more)

Posted: 26th, August 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment

Camber Sands: Super-sensitive Police report Katie Hopkins to Twitter for saying mean things

We live in strange and worrying times. Katie Hopkins, a woman who lost a competition for an office job in Brentwood, Essex, (The Apprentice), has said something about the deaths of five people … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comments (3)

Transfer balls: Arsenal get Lucas Perez and line up Mustafi for £26m

Arsenal can have Valencia’s German defender Shkodran Mustafi for £26m. so says Sky Sports, who describe Mustafi as the ” wantaway defender”.

The Star says the deal has been agreed.

No news elsewhere that is has been. The … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment

Mia Ayliffe-Chung: Smail Ayad, Allahu Akbar and mental illness

The Townsville Bulletin has more on the alleged murder of Mia Ayliffe-Chung. We don’t why she was killed.  We may never know, let alone understand the alleged killer motives. It’s alleged … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment

#traingate: Jeremy Corbyn and The Canary sing for an Aisle Free airline

On The Canary website, monocular readers can study Jeremy Corby’s responses to #traingate. “Corbyn delivers a brutal message to Richard Branson after the Traingate smear falls apart [VIDEO],” thunders one headline. The … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Politicians, Reviews | Comment

Transfer Balls: Arsenal, Manchester United and a ‘row’ over Phil Jones

The narrative that Manchester Untied boss Jose Mourinho and Arsenal’s Arsene Wenger are not best pals backs the Standard’s story: “Manchester United to snub Phil Jones bid as Jose Mourinho refuses to do business … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Arsenal, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comment

Dalian Atkinson: ‘You can stick your Tasers up your a***’

Dalian Atkinson: a look at reporting on the death of the former Aston Villa footballer.

BBC: “Tasered footballer given CPR for 35 minutes”

The post-Tasering facts are given to us straight:
Doctors battled … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment

Man accused of groping women goes free because women’s breasts were ‘gigantic’

He did not touch the breasts. The breasts touched him.
Swedish police investigator reportedly dropped a sexual assault charge because the two alleged victims had “gigantic breasts”. Two women reported a professional … (read more)

Posted: 25th, August 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment

Contact Us Writers